My baby is going to be 1 in a month. My baby. I have been a mom for almost a year. A mom. A year ago, I would have sat in front of you and told you that I have no clue how to raise a little human; to teach them the things they need to know in the world, to provide a standing and strong example for them, to teach them manners, to cover their mouth when they cough, to be a good, thoughtful, caring, and open-minded human.
All I would have told you is what I knew...I would love them and despite all the things I may do wrong, they will find their path. That notion, far off but almost in fingers grasp last October came so quickly and hit me like a ton of bricks. This little human, the moment she locked eyes with me, my heart was not only hers but she literally owned every inch, every beat and I did what I would have guessed, I have loved her every second of every single day for the last (almost) year and have had the best days and some of the best laughs of my life.
In the midst of every learning experience, every sleepless night, every snuggle, every tear, every overheated bottle or temper tantrum (yes they happen now!), I will be so devastatingly honest and tell you, that there were SO many moments where I had no idea what I was doing and I was praying that I was not messing up this little human. All I knew at some points was to just love her and in some strange yet perfectly simple way it, that is what makes a mother.
I may not have the routine down absolutely perfectly. There are days we miss nap time, or we eat way too many crackers for our own good, or most of our dinner is in our laps than in our mouths, or Romeo eats our toys. There are times when I think that we have traveled too much, in one year we have been on too many airplanes for just a little human. Then I think to myself, we have shared so many awesome moments, she has seen so much all ready with those little curious eyes, and I have been the best mother I knew how to be and have loved her every single second.
Her little eyes light up when she sees me, she reaches for me and says "mama", we listen to her favorite songs and dance every afternoon while making dinner and eating snacks, we snuggle in the mornings when she wakes up and play patty cake and peek a boo while having tickle wars and seeing who can laugh the loudest.
I may be a different mother than you or her and I think that is what is so beautiful about this job. We are constantly wondering if we are doing it all right because we love these tiny little humans so much. We love them and that is what being a mom is all about; just loving them so much and being their biggest fan and making sure they know this every day. There is honestly no greater happiness than coming home, walking up the steps and seeing two little smiling eyes peeking around the corner waiting for you. I love being a mom and I love love this little girl of mine.
